"Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow" - anonymous

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Smiling on the Inside

So I've been on a long road with my weight loss, yo-yo diets galore, and nothing ever seemed to stick. I always gained it back at some point or another.  Last January I looked into having a Gastric surgery, so I started the process then. I started on a high protein, low-carb diet, started exercising more and I started to loose some weight. While completing all the steps to qualify for the surgery, I had lost 20lbs and I felt really great about everything. So I finally had the surgery in July of 2011, where I had the realize band put it in. I was only in the hospital over night, and went home the following afternoon. I was sore for about a week or two, but otherwise healed pretty quickly. Adjusting to the 2 week diet of nothing but liquids grew to be a challenge but I made it through with flying colors.  Then I started back on mushy solid proteins, protein shakes, etc. The only form of exercise I could do was walking, so I tried to do that several times a day, a long with making sure I had about 60 fluid ounces to drink a day. So in all I have lost 70 pounds since my start in January, and I am extremely proud of what I have accomplished in such a short time. Sometimes I do not even recognize myself, I am in a size 16.  I do not remember ever being in that size in my adult life, I know as a teenager I hit that size maybe once.  But for the last month my weight loss has slowed down, and I am not exercising like I should be, hardly any at all to be honest.  I am not eating as much protein as I used to be, kind of slacking on a lot of things. I am not sure what has triggered this slow-down, and slip ups but I need to get myself back on track. I did not come this far to go back to where I was, never again will I allow myself to get that big.  I always ignored what I looked like, never really took in what I had done to myself over the years. But one day, a year ago I looked in the mirror and I mean really looked, and I was so disgusted by what I saw. And I never want to feel like that again, so I am determined now more than ever to get back into shape and live a healthy, happy life with my family. I never want my weight to be a health concern for me again.  Through the years I have suffered from depression, more than likely as a result of my obesity and a few other factors as well.  And though there are days I am sure I look like I am not the happiest person in the world, I know am smiling somewhere on the inside.  The love and support, I have received from my family through this whole process, has somehow brought us all closer and brought me to a happier and healthier place.  I could not have made it through any of this without my husband, children, parents, siblings, and friends.  I am blessed to have so many wonderful people in my life, who inspire me on a daily basis, so I want to take a moment to thank you all for being there for me and above all, loving me for me, no matter what.

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